I have always been interested in the “sixth sense” or the “third eye” – whatever you want to call it – and I finally got to the point where I said to myself, “screw it, you have nothing to lose.”
For starters, I am in an interesting place with my life. I have made so many changes in the past 12 months. Not just small changes, but BIG, life altering changes. I made them in the moment, dependent on what was best for me at the time and near future. I do not regret any of the decisions made, but sometimes I wonder if they were the right choices for me in the long run. This is why I decided that this would be a good time to try something new, something that could help me and give me some clarity on where I was with myself and my journey.
I made an appointment with someone after much research and hesitation. I found someone semi local with great reviews and a lot of practice. She had a credible website and it turned out to be a session that would lead me to a lot of clarity, but also thought on my actions in the moment and for the future.
I had walked in and sat down. All she knew was my name (which isn’t even my full name). She told me about what she did and how she usually does her readings. She told me to keep my feet on the floor and my eyes open. After we began the reading she started to talk to me about what she saw and what it meant.
Dancing. She could not put a type of dance to the action, but it was very active and energetic.
She told me not only that I am at peace with the decisions I have made, but that I am right where I should be.
She told me about the type of person, worker, and heart that I have.
These three things alone resonated with me deeply. I do not dance (well not on purpose…), but I am and always have been an athlete. Along with being very active, I like to stay busy and always be working on something or moving somewhere with whatever I am doing. It has always been important to me to be in touch with myself mentally and physically, but recently due to some medical complications, I have had to let go of this a little bit. Her telling me about how important this part of me was, I realized that I should not be scared to continue working on myself and being in touch with my active side.
I do agree with her about where I am with my life and my decisions. With that she told me it would really benefit me to surround myself with people of like mind. People who truly care about what they do, and work hard for what they want. People who put an excessive amount of heart into everything they do, just like me. This is where she told me about how passionate I am about motivating people and working hard. I have always been a leader at school, sports, and with a lot of the things I have taken on in my life. Right now I have been struggling to prove this quality in one aspect of my life. For her to mention that I truly care about what I do and motivating others to care as well, this reminded me to not give up on what I have been trying to prove.
She mentioned randomly and very specifically a decision I had made last year (and there is no way she would have been able to find this out or known about it before hand). She told me in detail, that it was good I made this decision and there was one more part of it that I have been struggling with. She told me to let go of that last part, and by doing so I would finally be able to move on.
I was then blown away. I had been kept up the night before thinking about one person that I needed to remove from my life. Not only did she tell me I was right, but she gave me the confidence to believe in myself and do what is best for me.
Lastly she asked about my childhood. If I ever wore a brace… if I was ever held back somehow physically. She said that she knew that this caused a lot of built up fear and worry about my life that I carried and that caused tension with my mom. Right then I almost started crying.
When I was in grade school, I believe 5th grade. I had told my mom that my knee hurt all the time and especially when I played sports. It took me two years of complaining and my pediatrician to get my mom to realize I needed it checked out. I got an x-ray and sure enough there was something wrong and from there on out I was supposed to wear a brace. I remember being scared about this limiting my life and making me different. My mom never did admit to me that she was wrong, that she should have listened. I was in pain and I was scared. I never realized until I was asked about this “brace” that I still held that fear with me. I have a history of injuries in that leg, related to strengthening that leg to make the problem have less of an impact. In the end, it was physical injuries that made me stop participating in sports, even training. This is when I lost touch with my body and what was important to myself. Realizing this, I understood how important it was for me to regain this confidence in myself. Was my knee injury holding me back? No, it was my fear that has been holding me back.
When she mentioned my mom I was blown away. Such a small detail almost made me lose my cool. My mom and I fight a lot. There is a lot of tension between us. I always felt like my knee started it all. That was when I started to doubt myself, think twice about everything, and also ignore physical pain as much as I could (not completely). For her to bring up my mom made me sad and scared. There is so much misunderstanding and lack of communication between us. It was then that I realized why. I am scared to be vulnerable with myself, let alone anyone else! (even though thats not uncommon)
I spent a few days thinking about what this woman had told me and what I should do with it. I think it is now that I use it to remind myself of the strength, heart, and motivation I have to not only be a better person, but be the version of me that I want to be.
**if anyone wants more information about this experience, let me know. I can try to answer any questions. Overall I highly suggest going out of your comfort zone. You never know what it will lead you to.**